Internet Fights

I think growing up with the internet everyone has the experience of an internet fight. Between blogs, instant messaging and facebook, what we do online becomes an extension of that we do in real life. What you IM your friends about can be a continuation of a joke from earlier on in the day, you may read the blog of your friend and see they've posted posted about what you did last weekend, and unfortunate photos of you can show up on just about anyone's facebook. So it seems to make sense that along with the good comes the bad.

In general I try not to read blogs written by people I know in real life. Because honestly blogs aren't far from diaries, and everyone knows you bitch about everyone in your diary. So I leave that be and assume I'm better off not knowing. One friend however recently separated from another friend in high school had directed me to the part of his blog where he had written down his anger towards me on one of his bad days.

Online fights create this weird dynamic. I was angry with and avoiding friend A because of what he had written about me, but he had no idea what he had done. In some way I considered what he wrote to be something he had said to others in my presence, but he had no idea that I had heard, and thus didn't apologize. And I didn't bring it up because I knew that in some way I was feeling guilty for having read his personal (yet obviously public) feelings and opinions on that one day.

On the other end of the spectrum I've done the 'over the internet' apologies. I like it because you can test the waters, and think carefully about what you're going to say. But in the same way I can't use facial expressions to show genuine emotions without the possibility of it being takes as being sarcastic. =/

The scariest thing about online fights is that there is the possibility for recording everything. I say dumb things all the time with the hopes that other people have just as bad / naive a memory as I do and will forgive and forget. Where does forgive and forget come in an online fight? when you delete the file? Text doesn't lose it's intent or anger over time. in essence if you save an internet fight - send it off to someone else etc. it retains all of the emotions and can be revisited at a later time where as when you tell someone of what someone said - it already loses it's credibility it's passing on and rephrasing.

Thus concludes the summary of my morbid fascination with internet fights.
(I'm feeling eerily like that guy in the huge chair on masterpiece theater that opens and closes each segment)
Until next time
-N